Make it count

On my way back today, I saw a homeless in front of McDonald's.

There's a cup on the floor, littered by one of their customers.

He bends down, picks it up, and drinks what's left of the water in the thrown away cup.

It breaks my heart to see, and it reminds me.

No matter how much my pain and burden is, it will never commensurate to what he's living through.

Thank you, sir, for always reminding me to be thankful for what I have.

"No one can make you feel inferior without your own consent" - The Princess Diaries

If you care enough to hate,

it means you care enough to feel.

Call it a temporary change or so, but I do believe the Eid feeling this year makes a difference. Today I heard a wise man told a story about the appreciation of life, the importance of having a strong family bond, the love between a parent and the child, the courtesy of being in your culture, and the life without love. I spent two hours listening to him, and by the end of the whole conversation, I realize the little things we often skip and take for granted are actually going to be the biggest deal in future.

The Life Without Love.

In life, there is a great deal of chasing the material importance that makes our daily needs complete. We chase the dollar bill in hope that by the end of every transaction earning us something more, it will make us a happier person. But beyond those material things, we do – in the end – need someone to share it with. The passion shared in young love is often looked down as juvenile by the wise. True, that love should wait, but always remember not to wait for too long.

When you’re in your 20’s and 30’s, it is only natural to seek to fulfil the needs and thrills of the young blood. Most people nowadays chase for career advancement in order to be financially stable by the age of 40. When you’re living the lavish life by the end of your 40’s, who would you want to share it with? In the end the answer would most probably be, to share with the one you love.

Why chase all the luxury if you don’t have anyone to share your happiness with?

When we grow old and wrinkly, I believe that the feeling of waking up in bed with your loved one by your side would be the most precious treasure. Wouldn’t you give to have someone to help you up when you fall? Putting you to sleep and kissing you good night every night? To share the loneliness when you need someone to talk to? To have someone you love? Or even, a companion by your side? J

Dear Mama.

Thank you for having me.

Thank you for raising me & carrying me for 9 months without fail.

Thank you for the pain you endured releasing me into the world to breathe.

Thank you for still accepting me no matter how ugly I was, I may be and however I am now.

Thank you for educating me.

Thank you for giving me my needs, although sometimes I may not remember about your needs.

Thank you for your sacrifice.

Thank you for your forgiveness every Eid.

Thank you for being you - a friend, a teacher, a mother.

Thank you for being my mother.

There is no one else who can replace you, and you are my one and only mother. Even though I don’t say it very often, I hope you know that I deeply love you, with all my heart.

Somehow, the late night sparks up a thought

Home is currently a family of five. Complete J

It’s been a while since the household has been this lively. The recent family dinner that we had in Ampang made me feel like a kid again. Having you parents around means they’ll always be paying for your material needs, making you feel wonderfully happy at the end of the day when you are able to get what you want without paying J

On the other note, it also relived the childhood mentality of living under the dominant parent rule; in my case, the father figure. Having him around means that I would always have to take note of what I wear. Something that is deemed to be indecent would definitely be a no-no. Other than that, the silent behaviour of texting your friends (or in my case, the boyfriend) discreetly to avoid any unwanted investigatory questions to pop out.

There’s just the relation – the parent and the child. The parent makes the rule, and the child follows. I would love to nurture the relation further in building a new level of trust and even friendship with my dad, but it is now a matter of him accepting my readiness. I don’t know if he’s already sub-consciously giving me the green light to build a new life for myself (career, love life etc), but I’m waiting for a sign.. A sign to indicate unconventionality! And I darn hope that it’ll come soon!

I am aware of myself as being the most rebellious child, but the lion will now choose to linger. I believe the good things will definitely come to those who wait (reasonably).